"This Just Keeps Getting Better" - A Reflection of Unnecessary Social Media Practices

To say that the Andy Byron affair coming to light at a Coldplay concert is public knowledge is far beyond an overwhelming understatement. I need to say at the beginning that in no way do I condone nor sympathize Bryon's actions before or after the Coldplay incident. I am sorry that Byron, his wife, and their children are experiencing grief and I hope and pray that reconciliation occurs sooner than later. That said, this post will not discuss Byron's affair. This post specifically addresses a greater issue: cultural capitalization of a person's failures.

Image by johnhain. Free for use under Pixabay content license.

The title of this blog entry comes from a shared Facebook post. The post was a share of an update of "the life and times" of the Andy Byron scandal with the comment, "This just keeps getting better." When I read this, it was then that I knew that this blog needed to be composed. If you are reading this, you need to understand where I am coming from. As a follower of Christ, here are just a few Scripture passages to reference when considering this post:

"The heart is more deceitful than all else and is desperately sick; who can understand it? 'I, the Lord, search the heart, I test the mind, to give to each person according to his ways, according to the results of his deeds.'" -- Jeremiah 17: 9-10

"Let no unwholesome word come out of your mouth, but if there is any good word for edification according to the need of the moment, say that, so that it will give grace to those who hear. Be kind to one another, compassionate, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you." -- Ephesians 4:29, 31-32

Why is our culture enthralled with exploiting the failures of others? Putting whether Byron getting caught publicly or coming clean to his wife and his confidants aside, shouldn't we as a culture of fellow human beings strive to come alongside him through his tragedy? I am in full support of the adage, "You made your bed, now you must lie in it" as a practical progression of justice - and from what I can see, Byron has certainly made his bed and seems to even be refusing that he ever messed it up. Notwithstanding, there is no excuse for the downfall of two people's sinful behavior to: a) become the center of public square attention, and b) to be used as proof of validation for someone's opinion.

Social media thrives on more than just drama. It has long since become the conduit for our culture to continuously matriculate the drama of others. In doing so, it perpetuates the illusion that our cultural livelihood is dependent upon it. This is bogus and stupid. The failings of others should not be thrust at the mercy of a public audience who only await the mere chance to capitalize on them. Rather, the litmus test result of one's intentions (and maybe even integrity) shows itself glaringly when It Just Keeps Getting Better is used as clickbait and proceeds to encourage the reader to further condemn the personal actions of someone else.

"Do not judge, so that you will not be judged. For in the way you judge, you will be judged; and by your standard of measure, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' and look, the log is in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log our of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother's eye!"--Matthew 7:1-5

As I write this, I am actually haunted by the severity of Jesus's words here. Yes, for the times that I do judge others in my own life. But, in this case, more for the public encouragement that posts like the one I reference here and others like it encourage. It is shameful for an entire culture to make a public media spectacle of someone's sin, but it is worse in my book for that culture to praised for doing so. Where does this praise lie? Within the desire for others to see people who have fallen to continue to fall. What is the point? I cannot begin to understand the multilevel pain that Andy Byron and his family and friends are experiencing, along with his mistress and her family and friends. But, why continue to praise the further destruction of someone who is already experiencing destruction?

So, I suppose that if I am willing to write a piece condemning behavior, I should provide a remedy or healthy alternative. In a question, "What then should we do?" First, run to Jesus: with prayer, anger, confusion, frustration, you name it. "But if I do that, and He doesn't answer, then what?" Well, the step that should NOT be taken is to take to social media outlets and further contribute to an already self-sustaining dumpster fire. My encouragement is to fight against it. Be countercultural in that regard. Don't condemn Andy Byron because the public has made him and his mistress easy targets. Rather, engage in discussions with others about the sins that so deeply entrench us as human beings. You will find that such conversations bring to light the true identities of those engaged in them, including you. Yes, it is quite possible that Byron's affair may have continued had it not been brought to light. But, doesn't God's Holy Scripture explain both sides of such an event?

"For there is nothing hidden which will not be revealed, nor has anything been kept secret but that it should come to light. If anyone has ears to hear, let him hear."

--Mark 4:22-23

"Therefore judge nothing before the time, until the Lord comes, who will both bring to light the hidden things of darkness and reveal the counsels of the hearts. Then each one's praise will come from God."--1 Corinthians 4:5

"Brothers, if someone is caught in any wrongdoing, you who are spiritual should restore such a person with a gentle spirit, watching out for yourselves so you also won't be tempted. Carry one another's burdens; in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ."--Galatians 6:1-2

"If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."--1 John 1:9

Note that how the sin comes to light does not matter. What matters is that the sinner confesses, repents, and that believers surrounding the person swoop in to help. When all of culture launches the attack, the smokescreen would suggest that it's virtually impossible to stop the angry mob. But, the angry mob isn't the focal point. Rather, it's our reaction to the incident itself. The angry mob will do what it wants: including crucifying Christ. What do we do? I plead with you: do not perpetuate an already terrible situation. Bring it up in conversation with friends, at church, with your small group, in a coffee shop. But, through conversation seek restoration--not condemnation.

Lastly, if we in fact do not follow what culture promises to be worth our while and virtually proliferate one's failings, what are we giving up? The chance for self-righteousness to reinforce what we already think of ourselves: "I'm pretty darn awesome and I'm glad that I'm not that guy." When we consciously pass up opportunities to condemn, there is a moment of reflection that occurs where we think one of two things: 1. maybe this isn't the best idea because of the repercussions it could bring (whether on you, the other person, or both), and 2. would I want to be in the crosshairs of someone else. The latter, I think, is where our God-given compassion comes in. Self-righteousness fuels the oppression of those around us because of the misplaced precept that we are, in fact, more superior in some form or fashion. Superior here is not meant to incorporate skill or ability, but rather existence value. Self-righteousness persuades us that "I don't do X because I'm not that bad of a human." I think this is at the heart of the title This Just Keeps Getting Better. I also think that social media has the potential to convince us that we are also not that bad of a human and therefore encourages us to act in like manner.

Andy Byron's actions shouldn't be condoned, but rather condemned. But not by me or you, and certainly not on social platforms. They should be addressed by those around him and in his inner circle - which, first and foremost, would be his wife. The downfall created by someone's actions, even if they are brought to light in the public square, should not be perpetually proliferated. It is up to us as Christians to uphold the compassion, love, and spiritual support of a hurting world. Are we suppose to bring sinful behavior to light? Absolutely. But in a manner that would lead to repentance, not further destruction of a person and his/her relationships. This is God's role. We are neither judge, nor jury, and we are certainly not the executioner. Social media has the potential to give us the illusion of that power. But our response should lead and encourage others to forgiveness and repentance from the Creator God of the universe who so longs to be in relationship with His creation.

"But if we walk in the light as He himself is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus His Son cleanses us from all sin."--1 John 1:7